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Roy Raymond, TV Detective!

Monday, April 28th, 2008 @ 1:00 am | Bad Science, Racism, Roy Raymond, What Were They Thinking

If you do not know of the joy that is “Roy Raymond, TV Detective”, then you have my pity. Roy was a supposed genius who ran a “Believe it or Not!” type TV show called “Impossible… But True!,”. The basic gist is that someone would always try some sort of obviously faked scam and Roy, because he was the Smartest Man Ever, would then debunk it. Occasionally even his own cast and crew would try to pull a fast one on him.

I chose to see Roy not as a brilliant man, but a man of average intelligence stuck in a world of highly credulous idiots. particularly his girl-friday/love interest Karen,

By way of example…

“Yes Karen, that’s the amazing part. Not that a parrot can form full sentences at all, or that it can complete math equations, or even that it can somehow hold a stick of chalk in it’s wings despite a complete and utter lack of any kind of prehensile grip. That’s nothing. The amazing think is that it ’speaks so well’. Why do I even keep your bigoted ass around?”

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  • Felix Morin
    0pfellc8201jsmec
  • "Gracious, Roy--that parrot speaks English as well as we do--and he isn't even an American!"

    Ah, the unabashed ethnocentrism of the times. Nowadays, this would be read aloud with a George W. Bush accent.

    Actually, Karen, the fact that he speaks English well certainly goes a long way to support the theory that he is not an American. On the other hand, he did use the word "really" instead of "most".
  • MikPal
    So people born on the islands of Britain and Ireland good english cannot speak?
  • Amake
    Don't forget dogs and especially horses have senses that would put Daredevil to shame. People in the room tell them when to stop counting with body language even if they mean not to.

    Writing the figures on a chalk board is a different story, though. :)
  • HellRazor
    If he's so smart, whats he doing in South America pimping out his mathematical knowledge for tourists?
  • He's not that smart. He's drawing his "8" backwards.
  • Um, meanings, not "meetings".
  • Actually there is evidence that birds do get the meetings, especially gray parrots. Google "alex gray parrot" some time.
  • Jon Snow
    Polly wanna crecker? Polly is cracker...
  • Maniac Doc
    Dierna: "Wait…he doesn’t think birds can talk??? So he’s never heard of Parrots and Myna birds??? I know of several birds who tweet to the Andy Griffith theme."

    Technically speaking, parrots and myna birds don't 'talk.' They can mimic sounds that they hear repeatedly, but there's no evidence that they actually understand the meaning behind the sounds, which is a fairly important aspect of speech. Hence the term "parroting."
  • Dierna
    Oh and you can't forget all those dogs that talk...like the ones who say "Mamma!"...I had a cat that could do that too tho. Gus was very smart (and loved doritoes...:P)
  • Dierna
    Powers:

    Well Clever Hans was just following his master. I've seen horses and heck even dogs do math on talk shows.
  • onion3000
    I don't believe it. I just tracked down and read the comic this came from (Detective 251) because I wanted to see how the parrot did the tricks.
    THERE IS NO TRICKERY!
    "Pongo" the parrot is supposed to really be that smart, and plays no more than a background character in a very weak diamond-stealing mystery.
    I feel horribly cheated.
    The main story though ("The Alien Batman") is hilarious.
  • there is some really weird lighting involved here. the shadows are totally inconsistent. Roy has a really dark one on his face, but the dramatic light doesn't seem to affect neither the guy in the blue toga, nor the air-headed blonde...
  • John Nowak
    To tell you the truth, I'd love to see a comic about a James Randi style debunker in the Marvel universe -- for every person who actually has powers, there are probably hundreds of people pretending to have them.
  • Complex maths? it's only an addition, please !

    Anyone can do that. But Speaking American-English as a real american when you're only a bird, wooooo what a shock !

    May I have a whisky... neat !
  • Give the guy a break. He's had to waste a ridiculous amount of time exposing "hundreds of hoaxers" who for some reason want him to believe that man can fly. That's a lot of hidden rocket packs.

    And he's not a detective, per se. He just plays one on TV.
  • Tony
    Either that Naryldor, or the explanation is that they somehow had a telepathic intelligence transplant.
    After all what she said is birdbrained.
    (As Fozzy would say, WAKKA WAKKA WAKKA)
  • naryldor
    A parrot doing complex maths and a human moron talking nonsense... Could this be the ultimate proof that craneal capacity has nothing to do with inteligence quality?
  • Powers
    There are horses that can add and subtract?

    You don't mean Clever Hans, do you? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Clever_Hans
  • "Why is Roy Raymond cupping his balls?"

    The answer to that question is also the answer as to why he kept Karen around! ;)

    http://comixbearbarecomix.blogspot.com/
  • HellRazor
    Why is Roy Raymond cupping his balls?
  • "Gracious Roy -- That Chicken plays Tic Tac Toe as well as we do (Gosh, that poultry beats me everytime !)-- And he isn't even an American..."
  • onion3000
    I think magnets are genuinely involved. The 'chalk', with an iron bar inside, is glued to the parrot's wing and being moved by someone behind the blackboard with a unfeasibly powerful magnet... who's also able to 'throw his voice', which by the way is total bollocks. Unless you're Superman.

    Come on Typolad, tell us how it was REALLY done?

    'Karen, you credulous little fool, the parrot has been hypnotised to believe it can do these feats!'
  • HellRazor
    I didn't know we started accepting parrots as U.S. citizens!

    See, Roy Raymond's show is not only entertaining, but educational too.
  • Dierna
    Wait...he doesn't think birds can talk??? So he's never heard of Parrots and Myna birds??? I know of several birds who tweet to the Andy Griffith theme.

    Animals can have knowledge of math. There's horses who can add and subtract so there could easily be birds who can do math but on a black board??? Perhaps, but not with its wings. With it's beak yes, but not wings...

    Unless that parrot is really J'onn in disguise...
  • Megalon
    Non Americans who speak English?! That un-possible! And J'onn used his Martian powers to help the bird hold that thing...magnetically.
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