Tag: Batman

  • A Travesty of Justice!

    So what, exactly, is a “travesty”? Is stuffing the jury box a “travesty”? No, it seems that it’s okay. After all, Batman and Superman would never do anything wrong, right? Right. So what’s a travesty? When you lose, despite stacking the deck in your favor. It’s funny, but I have another term for that situation.…

  • Black Canary is a Dick.

    Check this cover out: Okay, so Batman can’t see the guy aiming at him – but not only can Canary see him, she’s smiling. I think she’s getting revenge for Bruce kissing her mom that one time.

  • He Undressed Me With His Eyes!

    Wait, so Superman just goes around casually X-raying royalty? Male royalty? And people think Batman is a bit gay?

  • Bat Santa

    I was going to save this for the Holiday Season, but it’s too good to pass up The moral of the story? Never, ever give a Dark Detective a lump of coal. Ever.

  • What Yellow Fear Monster?

    Forget Parallax, here’s the real reason Hal destroyed Coast City:   Mind wipes – you just can’t trust them. Besides, isn’t wiping your own mind like performing brain surgery on yourself? (Also, because I am a Very Bad Person, I always hum “Gonna Wash That Man Right Out of my Hair” when I think of…

  • Bat Idiocy.

    This one just bugs me. 1) Why is Batman Scuba Diving in a cape? Why not just put on chains? Fabric gets HEAVY when it’s wet. Plus, there’s the issue of aquadynamics. 2) Killer whales don’t eat humans. Period. Sorry, no funny today. Just stupid.

  • Batman Gay? No Way.

    So, Batman’s gay, is he? Tell that to Dinah Lance Sr. Imagine if it had all worked out. Anytime Batman got too overbearing, Dinah Jr. would yell “Just because you married my mom doesn’t mean you get to boss me around!” Except, wait – Dinah Senior turns out to actually be Dinah Junior. That’s actually…

  • The Amazing Wayne Predicts The Future!

    Bruce Wayne has just walked in on Green Arrow sucking face with his secretary (a common problem in old comics, it seemns). What follows is NOT an example of Batman being a jerk, but reading this, I was struck by what a cool/accurate prediction it was. Why? Because after BC dumps Ollie, he DOES end…

  • “She’s Paralyzed With Surprise!”

    You’d be paralyzed too if Batman just got down on all fours and sniffed your crotch.